Monday, October 20, 2008

When Others Judge You

What to do? How to respond? (A lesson from Proverbs)

#1. Get used to it.
A. You're gonna be criticized and scrutinized. There are 6 billion people on the earth with opinions and eyeballs. You WILL be scrutinized and criticized some time in your life.
B. the more you do, the more you'll be criticized. In particular, the more you do for Christ, the more you'll be criticized.

#2. Listen
Prov. 12:15 - The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.
Prov. 13:1 - A wise son heeds his father's instruction, but a mocker does not listen to rebuke.
On the one hand, there is a time to say "enough!", but there is also a time to listen!!

#3. Bite your tongue
Prov. 10:19 - When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.
Prov. 18:13 He who answers before listening--that is his folly and his shame.
Even a fool who holds his peace is thought to be wise.

#4. Control your temper.
Prov. 14:29 A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly.
Prov. 29:11 A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.
James 1:19-20 (applies to #3 & #4) - we typically act in an unrighteous manner.

#5. Consider the criticism. There is a need for balance here.
On one hand, don't let man decide your course. But, realize that God may speak to you through man! He may direct you, correct you, teach you through them. REMEMBER, God spoke to Balaam through a donkey!! Num. 22

So, don't let men and their opinions decide, for you, But you might let God use them to direct you or correct you.
Contrast Col. 2:16 and Gal. 2:2

1 Cor. 4:3-4 On one hand, I care little for man's opinion, (or my own opinion!), BUT I care a great deal for God's opinion.

Therefore, I need to listen to man's criticism and consider it.
A. In the light of God's Word.
B. In a spirit of humility and prayer.
C. In the counsel of a wise friend.
All these lest I reject God's message!!

REJECT a "what right has he to judge me?" attitude. Truth is truth regardless of the source from which it comes, and regardless of the intent. (Balaam's donkey)
The source is NOT the issue, but is it truth!

Prov. 26:12 Do you see a man wise in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him.


#1. Give a controlled response or no response.
Prov. 15:1 A gentle answer truns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Prov. 21:23 He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.
There is a time to explain or defend, but there is also a time to be silent!

#2. Let it go
Prov. 12:16 A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult.
Prov. 19:11 A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense.

#3. Continue to be open. There is a danger of becoming calloused, bitter, vengeful, unreceptive, unresponsive, or critical! Judgmental!!!


#1. Admit it.
Prov. 17:10 A rebuke impresses a man of discernment more than a hundred lashes a fool.

#2. Make appropriate response, change, amends
Prov. 14:9 Fools mock at making amends for sin, but goodwill is found among the upright.

#3. Learn from you rmistakes.
Prov.26:11 As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly. "Everyone stumbles and falls, so, while you're down there you might as well pick something up"

#4. Grow!
Prov. 15:31-32 He who listens to a life-giving rebuke will be a t home among the wise. He who ignores discipline despises himself, but whoever heeds correction gains understanding.

God's purpose is to develop God-like character in you!! Don't waste your sorrows.

SUMMARY: Prov. 12:1 Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid. (and is likely to remain so)

1 Cor. 11:31 This doesn't mean wouldn't be criticized, but does mean wouldn't need (so much) correction.

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